Anger is a service to self emotion. Anger occurs when the person's ego thinks it has been wronged. Whether or not this is the actual case is not important to the ego. The ego makes up stories out of situations and either makes you feel good or bad.
For example: last night the kids and I were talking about our favorite color/flavor of starburst. I my oldest said he likes all but the yellow/lemon. I had said "I like all but the orange". He said he likes orange flavor but not the color. I said the same for yellow. My youngest (all angry) says "so you hate my hair!!!". His hair is dyed orange. The two start fighting. I get in the middle and say "no one said anything about your hair. Your ego is overreacting. We both love your hair it fits you perfectly." It took a moment but he calmed down.
You see the ego picks out pieces from a situation and runs wild with it. The ego is often not acting alone on this. Each person has many energetic implants running causing different emotions. This creates different realities that are vital for the entities feeding off of our energy. Understanding this is the first step in conquering anger.
Step two is acknowledgement of the anger. I am feeling angry. Feel this emotion safely. Meaning don't hurt you or anyone. Where is it in your body? What does it feel like? Try not to listen to the storyline in your mind. Just be with the actual feeling. This take practice the ego is very loud.
Next you may listen to the storyline and find out why you are angry. Don't engage with it. This takes self control. Be patient with yourself it will take practice. Now try to go deeper into the anger. What is a different emotion behind the anger. Anger is a front for many emotions. Fear, jealously, defensiveness, guilt, abandonment, betrayal, lack... and so on. Sit with this and try to understand why you are feeling this underlining emotion. There many be a few and that is ok.
Next see what this underlining emotion/emotions are teaching you. They many be alerting you to trust issues you have and need to work through. Maybe you have low self esteem. Maybe you wronged someone and feel you will be wronged the same way. Whatever it is find the lesson. After you have found the lesson explore how to get the most out of it. Be trusting? Love yourself more? Go for what you want?
Most importantly in order to integrate this anger and the underlining emotion you will need to forgive. Forgive yourself for feeling the emotion and forgive anyone else that was involved past or present.
Now because anger is mostly a cover emotion for an underlying emotion you will have to go through this process a lot. After a few time you will move through it quickly and just know what is happening and what you need to do.
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